• Kendra Dare

Golden Repair


September’s blog theme is ‘The Healing Home’, chosen to honor Virgo Season, which kicked off on August 23rd and stays with us until September 22nd.


If you know anything about astrology, you know that Virgo is associated with the Sixth House of our astrological charts. We all have an astrological chart comprised of 12 Houses, and each house rules a different part of our life. The 6th House rules our work, health, and routine.


Chani Nicholas, counseling astrologer and author of “You Were Born for This” writes, “Virgo’s symbol is the virgin, the archetype of individuals who belongs to themselves. Virgo is the priestess, and (has) a talent for understanding the ways of natural healing … Virgo needs to apply her energy toward what clarifies, specifies, and pinpoints both the problem and the remedy … Virgo’s nerves can often be soothed by cleaning, clearing, and cleansing. These daily or mundane rituals can become mini rites of passage for the Virgo. Putting things in order helps mental, physical, and emotional energy flow.”


I am a Virgo.


So is Cinderella.


On our good days, Cinderella and I are discerning, observant, thoughtful, efficient, organized, analytical and service oriented. We enjoy “editing” a thing down to its finest point. Edit, Edit, Edit. We thrive in circumstances where we get to wipe away the layers of grime and reveal the best of anything or anyone.


As I pondered Cinderella and the Healing Home, I initially thought I’d clean out my wardrobe and blog about that this week. I LOVE a good wardrobe purge, and I’m certain Cinderella does too (Edit, Edit, Edit). I could dive into the fact that, due to our Covid work-from-home-for-the-foreseeable-future situation, my wardrobe is really standing out to me as a sore thumb in the moment. I suddenly dislike 90% of the stuff hanging in my closet. I could blog about that, as well as the “edit”, and the end-result.


But I just never got motivated to clean out my closet this weekend.


This past weekend was Labor Day weekend. I figured that I would – for sure – find time during the three-day holiday to revel in a closet purge.


But no.


Instead, my extra holiday-weekend time was spent fussing over a couple pieces of old furniture I recently found while thrifting.


As I eluded to in last week’s blog post, I am now selling upcycled furniture and housewares in a little “Backroom Vintage” shop in my small town. I have been doing this for one whole week. I really, really, really, really, really, really, really love the idea of this. I have a great eye for design, I am ever-so inspired by design-delight and the thrill of the thrift hunt, and I am a VIRGO, which means I can make ugly stuff look Amazing with my bad-ass edit-edit-edit skills.

Here’s the problem.


I am now consumed with it.


No time for closet cleaning or wardrobe editing.


Well.


It’s only been one week.


But….

I’m getting a bit fussy.


Okay – here’s the deal. In paragraph #6 above, I outline how we Virgos behave on our good days. I haven’t yet mentioned the bad days.


Bad days are (as Chani Nicholas explains it): Hypercritical, micromanaging, and tearing your best efforts to shreds for lack of correctness. AKA: the dreaded perfectionism.


Gah! Perfectionism!


Let me say this right now: NO ONE, NO WHERE, NO HOW can find a sweet little forgotten piece of old furniture at Goodwill and make it look PERFECT.


And that, my friends, is what I struggled with all weekend instead of cleaning my closet. (and also instead of doing fun and relaxing things like non-virgo people do on holiday weekends)


After spending 2.5 days of my 3-day holiday wrestling with perfectionism, I turned to my old faithful, most reliable form of medicine. I took a bubble bath.


And – Virgo that I am – I grabbed a journal from a year ago to read while I was in the bath. I wanted to see what I was up to a year ago. I am always really good about journal-writing during my birthday month of September. I figured if I flipped the pages back 12 months, I could probably make myself feel better about how far I’ve come this past year. I opened the journal and turned back to my birthday-time entry of 2019.


And here’s what I had written:

WABI SABI “Making a space (home or life) particular to you can mean inviting imperfection into the design of your home (or life), and not apologizing for it.”

Kintsugi, Golden Repair = an art form to help shape the new perspective of the scars we bear = REFOCUS/REFRAME from “what should have been” into something more beautiful with what remains – and dusting off those layers of worn out perception to uncover the rare work of art, to honor who we were made to be all along.”

Kintsugi means “golden repair”. It is the Japanese tradition of mending broken ceramics with gold. The broken pottery is mended with lacquer dusted or mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.


This is the message the universe sent me today. Opening up an old journal to these exact words (???!!!!??!!!!!) I love it. Basically – The Universe dialed my number and yelled:


--HELLO! KENDRA!?! Are you there? This is the Universe speaking! Happy Birth Month! But first thing’s first! WABI SABI! KINTSUGI! Get it? Do you hear this? This is about the art of healing and embracing your flaws and imperfections. You want to write about ‘The Healing Home’? Whelp, here ya go! Pay Attention. Are you listening? Embrace your flaws and imperfections you beautiful, imperfect being. That is the first step on the path of healing. Thank you, nice talking with you, and have a lovely day. –

I remember now. I remember writing about Wabi Sabi and Kintsugi last September. Obviously the concepts struck a chord in me, and I jotted down a couple notes to explore at a later date. And there they were again, screaming from the journal page a year later.


Our homes contain the power to heal, which we will continue to explore over the course of this month’s blog posts. But for now, the most important thing we (I) can do, in this very moment is: Listen to the messages that find their way to you (me) in the middle of your (my) silly, hectic days. Stop. Walk away from the paint brush (for now) …


embrace the imperfection ...


… and let the healing begin.


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